Where am I?
How long will the darkness last?
Am I alone?
Will I make it back to the light?
What will I see when I can see again?
Darkness has the capacity to to shake us like nothing else can. Uncertainty is the kind of soul darkness that causes us to ask these questions deep on the inside. Uncertainty creates fear and the desire for control.
Control manifests itself in a number of different ways. Declarative statements, organization, hoarding, desperate information consumption. We all want control. We think.
The problem is that control is an illusion. It always has been. It’s just that sometimes it is an illusion that is backed up by our perceived experience. I am doing all the right things and all the right things are happening. Plenty of money. Stability in my job. Oh look! A promotion. This upward trajectory lures us into believing that we are the captains of our own ship. We begin to believe that we are the person we can trust.
And that’s just it isn’t it? This whole thing. This walk through life. It is all really a journey of trust and for some reason, trust is something that we just don’t want to do. I have trust issues we confess. And for that too, we have experiential evidence of why that downward spiral toward lack of trust is the most trustworthy path. Perhaps if I protect myself enough and cushion myself against loss and position myself in places of power I will be as invulnerable as I’m hoping to make myself.
But this too is an illusion. There is no safety in walling ourselves off from others. There is no safety in our money or our jobs or even our credentialed intellect.
Goodness that is bleak. Where does it leave us if control is an illusion? What are we to do when our best attempts at protecting ourselves and our families are also a fantasy?
The good news is found smack dab in the middle of the bad news.
God has made a way to find light in the darkness. He has created a reality where no matter the level of social distancing we experience, we are never alone. He has shone light into the darkness that the darkness cannot overtake. He has so loved us that no matter our physical reality when we emerge from hardship what we see will be made whole again.
He is our great Redeemer. His name is Jesus. And he meets us in the depths of darkness and uncertainty. Small and Pandemic Hardship. He is with us and he wants you.
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