The Feeling of Learning

May I tell you about one of my favorite feelings in the world? It's learning. I know that it makes me sound like a total nerd for putting this out there. It's ok, I own that persona... no need to call me out on it. But seriously, I love the feeling that comes with learning something new. We get little mists of this feeling when we learn new trivia or read a short article on twitter. A little surge of excitement...retweet, text a friend..."hey random stranger, did you know??"....

But what I am talking about is the feeling you get when you have been submerged in a concept or process emerge on the other side of a learning journey with something new...perhaps even as someone new.

I am sure I'm not alone in that not every concept automatically 'clicks.' Before the clicking....the struggle that leads to the lightbulb...that is the learning journey. A lot of people give up before they get to the aha moment. This can be in school, in relationships, even spiritually. Totally honest, I have wanted to give up before that moment a lot when it comes to mastering a concept. But that lightbulb moment, it keeps me going. It is the little reward at the end of the road. It is the taste of personal satisfaction.

I enter into this experience a lot and the sequence is always the same. (Perhaps you can identify)
1. Great enthusiasm for the new thing I am learning
2. Waning confidence that I can do or learn said thing
3. Great frustration in pursuit of just which way is up
4. Feeling of floating in a sea of confusion
5. An inching sense that there might be order coming
6. Bam! A moment of aha.
7. The triumphant feeling of learning!!

In my mind, the learning feeling plays out like the end of a great movie. I have overcome...there is music (Rocky) and sunshine and wind blowing my hair and cardigan (obviously) as I walk down the sidewalk. And I am smiling.

That my friends is why I learn. Learning is living.

It is quiet

I feel suspended in this. Like I am floating in the ocean. The quiet hum of an old air conditioner, the sturdy presence of aged books, oak tables and no person in sight. A smile on my lips, I am at peace alone with you.

I wouldn’t know the beauty of silence if I did not live in noise. To some people noiselessness is uncomfortable, scary even. Not to me. I know you are here in the silence. I can feel you near when it is this quiet. There has not been any sound so comforting as this hush. Because in this indulgent space, I am still and my heart is at rest. There is no noise, without or within. Still. Focused. Aware. Thankful.